Blog
Birth Mother
Posted by Janet Mendenhall on July 12, 2010 at 7:40 am
Birth mother is an interesting term. It defines the role of a woman in an unplanned pregnancy choosing to sustain life and place her child with an adoptive family. Adoptive parents use it to describe the presence of that woman in their family. And it fits as adoptees grow and need to fit those women into their lives.
But the term, “birth mother” is limiting. It is inadequate to explore the true depths of that woman. It can’t explain her hopes and dreams, nor address the emotional investment she has made in the child she has placed.
There are other words — like sustainer, nurturer, strong, selfless — that more completely describe the person. These words fit my friend, April.
April contacted Christian Homes last November. She was homeless, unemployed and the mother of a 16-month old little girl named Sarah. She was also estranged from her family, unsure of her future and pregnant. April knew Sarah needed the stability of a family that she could not provide, so Sarah was placed in a loving foster home. April also knew the life she was carrying needed the same. She wanted them both “to have a Mom and Dad that would raise them right in a Christian home.” Looking back, she knows coming to Christian Homes was the right choice, though not an easy one and certainly not one to be taken lightly.
April smiles when she talks about the Foster-to Adopt home where Sarah is thriving. Her smile gets even bigger when she shares Sarah’s most recent smile in the new photograph sent to her because of the semi-open relationship she has with Sarah’s family.
In May, April gave birth to another beautiful girl who was placed in an open adoption with a family April chose. The relationships with those two families put April at peace and allow her to watch her dreams and hopes come true.
“I think of them every single day.” April says. “Christian Homes did so much to take care of me — they were kind to me, took me to the doctor, helped me with counseling and gave me everything I needed. They encouraged me to be a better person. I went to FaithWorks and finished that. I am a different person today. I feel like I can make friends now. My self-esteem and self confidence have been boosted real high.”
April is moving into Hope Haven and looking for a job. And when she is not thinking about those gorgeous little girls, she is “thinking all the time and real hard about going back to school and studying criminal justice.”
April is strong and selfless. She is a sustainer and nurturer. She is one of our beautiful birth mothers.
Names have been changed to protect the identity of this birth mother and her family.
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